Entah sudah berapa lama aku menghabiskan waktu untuk bermain Google Earth, tapi bosan sama sekali belum dekat di mata. Jadi teringat dulu teman kos di Belanda pernah menunjukkan padaku bahwa kita bisa melihat tempat tinggal kita dengan jelas. Kemarin seorang kenalan baru yang menarik menunjukkan tempat asal dia di Google Earth. Kemudian untuk mengilustrasikan jauhnya tempat itu dari sini, dia memutarbalikkan bola dunia itu, melewati benua Antartika dan akhirnya sampailah kita di Singapura. "That's the farthest we can go in the world," katanya. Suatu hari, aku akan ke tempat itu. Entah kapan, tapi pasti, suatu hari.
Sejak kecil, aku selalu bilang aku ingin keliling dunia. Dulu rasanya keliling dunia bisa diartikan sebagai jadi turis di kota-kota yang terkenal. Tapi melihat tempat-tempat terkenal hanya bisa memberikan memori sebatas selembar kertas yang akan menguning seiring waktu (atau mungkin jutaan pixels yang bisa hilang ketika komputer rusak). Aku ingin, ingin, ingin keliling dunia dan menjadi bagian dari dirinya. Semoga suatu hari keinginan ini bisa kesampaian.
Kenapa susah sekali menulis dalam Bahasa Indonesia? :s
Monday, 15 October 2007
Wednesday, 10 October 2007
Tuesday, 9 October 2007
Thinking in circles
I don't understand myself. Life is OK, I'm taking schoolwork slowly but it's all under control. I still meet my friends on regular basis. I called home, sometimes. I get enough sleep everyday. Despite all these, I have this constant nagging voice in my head that tells me It's not OK.
I think I need purpose in life. It's not OK to live just to do what you have to do. I forget when was the last time I wanted something so badly that I would lose sleep just to work towards the goal. Life is so mundane now that I'm just too lazy and confused to think about what I want to do after I graduate next year. I don't have a plan. I don't feel the impulse to plan even when everyone around me has started to do so. I hate mediocre life, I'm living in one now and I am doing nothing to change it.
Maybe I just need to fall in love, some people say that would solve it all. Really? As if it's easier to fall in love than to get a job that you like.
I think a cold shower will do for now.
I think I need purpose in life. It's not OK to live just to do what you have to do. I forget when was the last time I wanted something so badly that I would lose sleep just to work towards the goal. Life is so mundane now that I'm just too lazy and confused to think about what I want to do after I graduate next year. I don't have a plan. I don't feel the impulse to plan even when everyone around me has started to do so. I hate mediocre life, I'm living in one now and I am doing nothing to change it.
Maybe I just need to fall in love, some people say that would solve it all. Really? As if it's easier to fall in love than to get a job that you like.
I think a cold shower will do for now.
Friday, 5 October 2007
Learning a language
... is a lifetime decision, an act of violence one inflicts upon one's self without logical explanation.
Really, it's back to the basics. Suddenly your language ability is reduced to "Insufficient". Not being able to convey what you are thinking, not able to understand fully what others are saying to you, reading a book is out of question.
And there is this constant inadequate understanding of the language. Like why in Chinese, "last week" is "上个星期" (literally, above week) and "next week" is "下个星期" (literally,below week); why in Deutsch, "fahren" means both "to travel" and "to drive".
Learning a language demands a lot from you. Memorizing words or phrases and understanding grammar are never enough. You have to carry the culture and the history of the language on your back. You have to let yourself into the murky pool of subtleties, uncertainties, and deviations. By learning a language, you beg to assimilate into a private circle of natives; something that perhaps even a lifetime could not accomplish.
To learn a language, you need to learn to be a child again; one with a mind like sponge, unconstrained, and willing to learn something wholly new, and sometimes illogical.
Language is identity; the very, if not the main, essence of root. We all long to be understood. There was an Indo song that goes like:
Biarpun saya pergi jauh
Tidak kan hilang dari kalbu
It is a song about Motherland (in Bahasa: tanah air, which literally translates to waterland). How do you identify your Motherland? Not the place (because developments change the face of a country, especially city at the speed of cash flow), not the people (in this global era, people once again become rather nomadic and as always, people change). The only constant determinant of Motherland is language.
Ah, the beauty and complexity of language. I am glad the Tower of Babel fell.
在中文课的时候， 老师问我，你为什么要学华
Really, it's back to the basics. Suddenly your language ability is reduced to "Insufficient". Not being able to convey what you are thinking, not able to understand fully what others are saying to you, reading a book is out of question.
And there is this constant inadequate understanding of the language. Like why in Chinese, "last week" is "上个星期" (literally, above week) and "next week" is "下个星期" (literally,below week); why in Deutsch, "fahren" means both "to travel" and "to drive".
Learning a language demands a lot from you. Memorizing words or phrases and understanding grammar are never enough. You have to carry the culture and the history of the language on your back. You have to let yourself into the murky pool of subtleties, uncertainties, and deviations. By learning a language, you beg to assimilate into a private circle of natives; something that perhaps even a lifetime could not accomplish.
To learn a language, you need to learn to be a child again; one with a mind like sponge, unconstrained, and willing to learn something wholly new, and sometimes illogical.
Language is identity; the very, if not the main, essence of root. We all long to be understood. There was an Indo song that goes like:
Biarpun saya pergi jauh
Tidak kan hilang dari kalbu
It is a song about Motherland (in Bahasa: tanah air, which literally translates to waterland). How do you identify your Motherland? Not the place (because developments change the face of a country, especially city at the speed of cash flow), not the people (in this global era, people once again become rather nomadic and as always, people change). The only constant determinant of Motherland is language.
Ah, the beauty and complexity of language. I am glad the Tower of Babel fell.
Tuesday, 2 October 2007
Life is a cupcake (sometimes, at least)
Soft and creamy, sweet and pretty, you tantalize my tastebuds. I need more of those eyes-closed-mmm-i'm-in-heaven moments.
more on Posie Gets Cozy
